anxiety

So many things lately are causing me a lot of anxiety...I mean A LOT!!  This blog being one of them.

I so badly want to document our days, but our days keeping slipping through my fingers. I have so many ideas to blog about, but then time passes by and it seems like old news.

Do you ever have so much to do, that everything seems so overwhelming, and then you do nothing?
Happens to me every.single.day!

I don't want this post to seem disorganized, but I think it'll make me feel better if I just throw it all out there in a big mish-mashed way. (mish-mash, is that a word?)  It's kind of how my brain has been working lately :)


First up...the 3 precious souls that are fast asleep in their beds.

Now that Paxton is 5 months, I'll give you the stats at his 4 month well baby check:
          Weight: 17lbs. 12oz. (84th percentile)
          Height: 26.75 inches (92nd percentile)
*This kid is rockin' life!
*We started him on cereal and he loves it.
*He rolls and scoots himself all over the floor.
*At times, he is soo very quiet and just takes it all in. Other times he is as social as they come. He loves to smile, laugh, and talk with anyone who will talk to him.
*He loves his baths (and pees 100% of the time).
*He chews on EVERYTHING.
*He's wearing size 2 diapers and 6-9 month clothes. He is soo long! I am constantly rearranging his closet, taking out the old and putting in the new. I can't keep up with the pants that more often than not look like capris :)
*He goes to bed around 8pm.
*He still gets up at least once (if not twice) a night to drink a bottle.
*He has the brightest blue eyes and brown hair that stands straight up.

He seriously is the BEST baby. I don't know how we got so lucky. I could sit and snuggle him all day. Watching him sleep in my arms or rubbing that fuzzy hair against my cheek, my heart melts. We are smitten with this little guy!

Kaden and Kenley:
*Wow! These are two crazy 2 year olds! They have developed soo much personality. I don't even know where to start.
*Most recently, we switched them from their cribs into their toddler beds. Even though they've only been sleeping in their beds for a few nights, it's definitely been a challenge but I guess it could be worse. They think it's pretty exciting so they are very wild when they climb into bed. They like to get out (but haven't yet left the room) and they like to climb into bed with the other one. Kaden is scared. When we get after them to get back into bed, he hustles his butt and feels bad. Kenley on the other hand, not so much. She will say "NO", stare you down, and inch herself further and further off the bed. It's lovely.
*They have started asking "why" to every thing we say...this is driving Cody nuts :)
*Kenley responds with "no" or "no way" to everything we ask her to do. And as of lately, she's started adding "dude" behind it. She's a nut!
*They are soo very independent. They want to do it all by themselves. We've learned to just get used to spending a little extra time to let them do things on their own, or we will have complete melt downs.
*Speaking of melt downs...we're still having them...a lot!
*They've been able to open the doors for a while now, but they have also now figured out how to unlock the doors. So there has been more than one occassion where we've caught them out the kitchen window playing in the back yard...man they're quick! What the heck!?!

Oh, how these two keep us on our toes. They make parenting the best job and at the same time make me question why I wanted to parent in the first place :) They can be so much fun or they can make us want to pull our hair out.


Onto my anxiety. Remember I shared with you that I was put on an antidepressant after Paxton was born to help with my emotions and anxiety? Well, my emotions have settled down greatly. I can count only a couple of times where my eyes have even gotten teary (this is huge people)! But my anxiety...holy cats! This still seems to be getting the best of me at times. Maybe I'll post on this topic more in the future.

My house is going under in a big way. Laundry is a full time job. I can't stay on top of the dust. The mail keeps piling up. I can't seem to get on top of anything. It takes everything I've got just to maintain.

And money. Oh my. If that isn't a stressor.  But what's new right?


Why the heck can't i get it together?